Today's conundrum: "WHY?"

RichardWhy oh why did the good Lord decide to take my dear Richard Whiteley? We were such excellent friends. We used to laugh and frolick in the fields and make up amusing puns about bumblebees and other more ludicrous objects. Just the other day, I went round to his house for tea and biscuits. The sofa smelt slightly of urine and had an ambiguous stain on it, but I didn't like to say anything. He gave me shortbread. He spilt the tea on my crotch and tentatively wiped it up with a tissue. We laughed! He seemed fine. If only he'd told me he was going to die. Inconsiderate or what?

That whore Vorderman. She's loving this. All the attention now my love Richard has passed on. Well guess what Carol? Countdown is CANCELLED. The show cannot go on without Richard! (Unless a suitable replacement is found). I wouldn't be surprised if she'd detatched his IV drip. She was always jealous of his lexical prowess whilst she struggled along making 2, 14, 28, 50 and 75 equal 873. You're going nowhere Carol, you callous MURDERER. No OBE for you, you bitch.

Permalink || Posted 27/6/2005 by Pete


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